and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
