I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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