I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
apparently the secret to your success is patron
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I have aggressive nipples.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
