Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
