I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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