shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
