Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just want to make out with him forever
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
