Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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