Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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