i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
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