i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
