Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
