I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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