the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize
