I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
