with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
