would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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