What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
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