you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
cat food counts as protein by the way
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
