Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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