I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize