So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
