What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
