did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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