My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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