We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
