we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
