I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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