I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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