so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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