I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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