I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
that may or may not have been my penis.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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