I'm really into asian looking animals
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
