you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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