That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
