So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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