At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
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