Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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