they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
