That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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