Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
