She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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