i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
