Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
