it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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