I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
