hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
