Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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