he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
