I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
